140113

by

one hundred and forty five.

Today was rather fun =D.

Met up with Selina (a good friend of mine from UNSW who will be coming again here for her exchange program) and a few other new faces + Carolyn and Eero.

We met up at Myeongdong and had lunch and a cafe sesh before she had to meet up with her aunt, cousins and sister for their evening program.

The first thing she said to me was... "Omg Obed, your Australian accent is gone!"

Apparently I've picked up a mixed accent.. A bit of American, Australian and... other stuff.. Haha.... Maybe my family will enlighten me further on this....

;D.

After parting ways with Selina, the rest of us went to Hongdae to eat dinner and then home time XD.

We had good ol' bbq where there were a lot of young waiters/waitresses and us guys were naturally checking out the waitresses. Hahaha.. I was rather busy feeling stupid because I still can't understand what she was asking/saying when we were ordering -_- sigh.... I'm sorry. I'm rather worried now for when my family gets here because I'll have to do all the talking if they don't understand English.. Uh oh.

Haha... On the topic of girls.....

Mmmm....

Had a rather interesting chat today with a friend of mine.. and also something I noticed the past few days...

A lot of the girls I've met lately seemed to have lost all attachment/belief of 'love'... Saying that love is for children and there is nothing wrong with dating hundreds of guys before settling down at a later age.

It's always been a tough topic... Dating and what-not... The average person today would somewhat agree with that mentality... It's completely fine to romantically roam free and try all sorts of things before having to settle down with that one person for the rest of your life. They say that 'love' is childish and there is therefore no incentive in being a serious dater. 

I don't know.... I'd like to differ...

Roaming around freely and dating several guys/girls for the fun of it sounds more childish to me than to practice responsibility, faithfulness and discipline with one partner. Isn't the former what high schoolers do in the prime of youth?

But it is unfortunate.. These days it is hard to trust the other party... Putting your heart and your feelings in the hands of the other 'person' is a big choice.. You leave yourself vulnerable to all sorts of pain. 
That is apparently the biggest reason why some people I know don't put their all into relationships... They are afraid to get hurt so they barricade themselves within a wall of hesitation. They hold back on their feelings simply because they are afraid of the unknown... 
But I think that is where the problem lies.... When you barricade yourself like that, not only are you afraid of what is to come... You are seeing it with a negative perception.
Face it... Some people long for relationships WITHOUT the words - commitment, responsibility, faithfulness and longevity.... The unwanted criteria in a contract... The reason(s) why pure relationships aren't sought after the way Disney love stories depict.

It is a sad reality... But a reality that has become common today. Movies, songs and TV shows teach us that there is fun and an exciting sense of youthful exuberance in cheap hotels, one night stands and "let's see how many guys I can date this year" mentalities. What they don't reveal however... is a list of all sorts of pain - that disgust when you wake up the morning after next to a stranger... that guilt when you realise you're playing around with someone... that maddening obsession of wanting to be better than your lover's past lovers... An endless cycle of narcissism and a deeper detachment from your childhood fantasies of 'love'.

I know a lot of people who are completely fine with this... And that's fine with me... If you're happy with that kind of life... Go for it. I just hope that the person you settle down with is fine with your history or that he/she has an equal history to match. I don't intend to judge anyone and I have no right because I too, have my own history to account for. Albeit a past I am not proud of, but it has made me realise all the more how much I long for a Disney ending to my love life.


I have friends that cry over the fact that they have been single for 2 years.... 1 year.... 6 months...

But I also know that there are those who haven't even felt the sting of a break-up for 21 years of their life.

Some people would rather be called childish for still believing in love... than to be called otherwise for taking the beauty of partnership lightly. Today, I've been called childish. But I acknowledge that proudly.
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-8a.

A beautiful passage... A true description of love.
Once you start excluding one of the above traits in a relationship, I cease to believe it as 'love'.

The infinitely more beautiful thing however... is that it is meant to reflect God's love for us.... Unconditional.. and unparalleled. 

It is the kind of love that I can rely to last forever.. 
Despite how 'beautiful' or 'idealistic' my ideal perception of a relationship is... It will never live up to the love God has shown not only to me.. but to everyone who has stepped on this Earth, and those who will.

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On a similar topic....

It's funny how in the past, girls that are:

- harsh
- ice cold in nature
- easy to get
- bad-girl type
- alcohol lovers
- smooth with words/flirty

have seen reservations in my soft spots...


But now... the girl that I'm after (hopefully genuinely) is the complete opposite of those (and with a lot of other bonuses).

It's been over a year now... And I still don't know where I'm going with this.... Sometimes I do wish it was simpler.... But then I'd remember what my father has always said.......

"The harder it is for you to get a girl... The harder it is to let go."